If My Younger Self Could See Me Now
If my younger self could see me now…
She would congratulate me first, for still being here.
“It’s all about grace,” she would say, and I would nod, because it truly is.
God has been faithful, she would acknowledge that too.
She would probably laugh at my level of ignorance, wondering why it took me so long to realize some things, or to stop taking opportunities for granted.
My younger self would tease me for not becoming everything I once promised to be.
She’d ask questions like:
“Why aren’t you abroad yet?”
“Why am I not hearing your voice on the radio?”
“Why haven’t I seen you on international television?”
“Why isn’t your blog as famous as Linda Ikeji’s yet?”
And maybe she’d tilt her head a little and ask,
“Why did you let the people who hurt you get so close?”
“I thought we agreed to trust less and stay focused on the bigger goal?”
But even through all her playful teasing, she would still smile.
Because she’d be proud, proud that I became more beautiful in my ways, proud that I chose peace, proud that I learned to love gently and forgive deeply.
She would admire the courage I have shown over the years, maybe even hug me as a quiet comfort for all the pain I have endured.
She would probably remind me of that old plan to put everyone on the “suspect list” because people never fail to disappoint, and we would both laugh, because now I understand that wisdom doesn’t mean building walls, it means setting boundaries with grace.
Maybe she would congratulate me for choosing to settle down and have a family, something we never included in our grand plans.
Maybe she would laugh at my “broke girl era,” or shake her head and ask, “What happened, girl? I thought we agreed to make money for the family, to hold it all together?” But I am certain she won't blame me much, I would smile at my younger self and say, "Hold on, baby girl. It doesn't matter how far, or when, or the age I started, the point is that I started, and every last one of our dreams will be achieved, slowly but steady."
To you who is reading this right now, I hope you embrace your mistakes and missed opportunities and start anyway. It’s never too late to begin again. I hope your younger self is proud of you too, and I hope you find that comfort you earnestly yearn for.
If you read to this point, let’s connect deeply, share with me in the comment section what your younger self would say to you if he or she could see you now.
©️ HerMixedMuse
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